What We Learned In The First Year of Marriage

Hello you, and welcome to inside the mind of an Obsessive Compulsive Designer.

In celebration of our first anniversary as husband and wife, I thought I’d do a post diving into a few things we both learned in the first year of being officially married. It’s been a whirlwind of a year but it’s been a great one. I think you’ll find the lessons we learned are a little different than what you usually see; but, they’re all good lessons that make us love each other all the more!

Similarity & Consistency

People say that the first year of marriage is the hardest year you’ll have together. We found that things stayed quite consistent for us. We had lived together for a couple years before getting married so there was no REAL big change in that department. We left for the wedding from the same home, got married, and returned to the same home and did the same things. However, the hardest year we encountered was the first year we lived together. It’s hard blending two different people’s schedules and habits, especially with someone you love. We have never been traditional so I guess living together before the wedding saved us the hard first year that everyone talks about!

The Next Big Step

The two biggest questions after you get married are about buying a house and having a baby. I didn’t even make it out of our reception before someone asked when the babies are coming. Like, can we just appreciate the fact we just got married two seconds ago?! For some reason, people are always going to be looking into your future for the next big exciting step. Your answer to those questions will start to become routine. 😉

The Ominous Word

The word marriage or the fact that I’m someone’s wife doesn’t bother me or change anything. My husband and I weren’t affected by the fact that we have an official title. Some people get giddy or go overboard with the Mr. and Mrs. décor throughout their home; however, we didn’t. We have been together for so long, and have been living together for so long, that we didn’t view the wedding as anything quite as life-changing. We got married to essentially declare to the state that we love each other. We still love each other just as much and just the same.

It’s All In A Name

If you’re the lucky duck who gets to deal with the name change, I wish you all the best. I’m still finding things to this day that need my last name changed. It is a never ending process. I thought I took care of everything when we first got married but I still consistently find new companies that have my old information. It’s a long tedious process…yay!

Patience & Compromise

As with any relationship, it’s taught us a higher level of patience and compromise. Of course, by six years into our relationship, we had learned to be patient and compromise with each other. However, after marriage, the things we needed to compromise on or be patient with doubled in scale. Life gave us more opportunities to work on these skills at a higher level. It wasn’t a compromise on where we wanted to eat or whose family holiday we would go to on which day. We now have to compromise on vehicles, houses, life changing opportunities. It’s like our entire relationship was a training exercise for the big choices we now have to make.

Leave me a comment below and tell me what the most important thing you’ve learned in your marriage is thus far!

Photo cred as always goes to the amazing Capture Life Portraits 🙂

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

signature

Wedding Planning Essentials

1

Hello you, and welcome to inside the mind of an Obsessive Compulsive Designer.

For those who may not know, I LOVE planning. Planning big events, or even just a small get together, gives me life. Event management was always my back up career if design hadn’t panned out. So, planning my wedding is very exciting to me and I love every single moment. Planning – I love. The stress that comes along with planning? Not so much. Which is why my fiancé have been engaged for a year already and our wedding date is still over a year away. We’re an oddball couple for today’s standards it seems with a 2+ year engagement. However, my fiancé and I both wanted a long engagement. We were living together prior to our engagement so marriage really isn’t going to do anything different for us besides make it “official”. Why rush it? I’d much rather take my time and enjoy the planning without the stress of an impending deadline. So that is exactly what we are doing! Being a perfectionist isn’t exactly a great trait for planning such a big event; however, I’ve found a few tools that have been making the process a breeze!

Until I got engaged, I had never seen The Knot anywhere but now that I have been planning, I see it EVERYWHERE (and thank goodness for it). The Knot has simplified so much for me and really helped me open my eyes to how many little details need to be decided. I went ahead and purchased one of their books, The Knot Book of Wedding Lists, and a planner of theirs called The Knot Ultimate Wedding Planner. These two items have helped so much. First of all, how great are lists? This book of lists is a life saver and helps me prioritize both with scheduling and budgets. They bring up lists of questions to ask vendors and venues that I never would have thought of. Asking these questions saved me so many headaches and hidden fees along the way. It definitely helps me make my decisions much faster. I’m a big advocate for planners and this wedding planner is great. They provide numerous pages to fill in with your thoughts and desires from your vendors and your big day in general. They even help with colors and inspiration. (Which was not needed for a designer with thousands of wedding Pinterest boards in the make.) This planner is huge and allows plenty of room to add more material. When I was interviewing venues I kept all of the brochures and pamphlets they gave me in here along with my annoyingly diligent notes. This way I can keep all of my vendor’s information in one safe place.

Both of these books have been a GREAT help and definitely help me keep my OCD in check. 😉 I can’t wait to keep using these throughout this planning process. I’ll post the links to where you can buy these books down below if you’re interested. If you have a wedding coming up, I highly recommend!

The Knot Book of Wedding Lists : http://www.amazon.com/Knot-Book-Wedding-Lists/dp/0307341933?ie=UTF8&*Version*=1&*entries*=0

 

The Knot Ultimate Wedding Planner : http://www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Wedding-Planner-Organizer-binder/dp/0770433367?ie=UTF8&*Version*=1&*entries*=0